I’m a relationship expert – 9 golden rules for first dates, including the best night to meet and how long to wait before texting

FIRST dates can be a nerve-wracking experienceespecially if you’ve never met the person before.

There are so many unwritten rules – from how long to stay to when to text if you like them without looking “too hot”.

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And with so many people connecting through dating apps like Tinder and Bumble these days, how can you tell if there’s real chemistry?

Relationship expert Jo Hemmings says, “Whether you’re a dating veteran or a single newbie, first dates are always nerve-wracking. Mutually.

“That’s part of the potential excitement of where it could go.”

Here, she shares her tips for making your next first date go smoothly — and the red flags to watch out for.

90 minute rule

Plan to limit your first date to an hour and a half maximum.

That way you can avoid all the anxiety about whether or not you like each other or where it might lead by telling them before the date that you need to be somewhere else later.

If you find that the date goes better than expected, you’re either sticking to your plan or mysterious cancellation ensues.

Pick a Tuesday

Sunday evenings are the main app dating time. Then meet your match, chat on Monday and meet up on a Tuesday.

No need to hover around waiting for the weekend, Tuesday (or straight away Wednesday) is the perfect time for a first date during the week.

If you really like each other, it paves the way for a follow-up appointment over the weekend.

The first impression counts

You may try to revise your first impression of your first date because you want to please them or not to upset them.

Or maybe because you want to give them a chance, which is all good.

But notice and remember your first reaction to her when you saw her in that first moment.

It can be quite revealing. Your heart may not miss a beat, but those few seconds are often more important than we’d like to believe.

And an initial “can’t” feeling probably won’t reverse, no matter how hard you try.

You’re not on The Apprentice

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I know a first date is a a little like a job interview to assess whether you are a good match or not.

But try not to fire off a bunch of questions on your date.

It will make you both feel even more uncomfortable.

Avoid lettuce

Sure, you eat healthy – and even if you don’t and live off Maccy D’s, you want them to think you do, right?

But just about anything small and green — from spinach to parsley to watercress — has a nagging habit of catching on your teeth right where your smile is widest.

Actions speak louder

Signaling whether you like someone—or not—on a first date can be put into words.

A simple tip is to lean in towards them when you like them and back away from them when you don’t.

It’s subtle enough to get the message across and easily picked up by your date.

The WOW rule

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This is wine, a water.

It’s easy to get messy on a first date because you’re too anxious to eat or because a few drinks give you a little Dutch cheer.

To keep your head clear, drink a glass of water between each alcoholic drink.

You will thank me in the morning.

keep an open mind

You shouldn’t be expected to go into details on the first date about what your wedding day will be like or how many children you want.

But if you’re looking for something casual or more serious, be honest about what you want.

Respect your date’s views and openness, even if you didn’t expect it.

But listen to your instincts.

Your date might start talking about their ex, something politically uncomfortable, or just behave in a way that you know doesn’t feel right.

If your gut tells you something is wrong, apologize and just walk away.

When to text

First, there’s nothing more uncomfortable than seeing a couple on their first date nervously glancing at their phone to check pings and notifications.

Your phone may be a modern security blanket, but alerts can wait. put it away

If you enjoyed your date and would like to see them again, have them send you a thank you text when you get home.

It shows enthusiasm without being overzealous.

If you didn’t like them, you don’t have to go on at all.

First dates are often first and last dates, don’t fool someone you don’t like.