The hardworking Philipps talks about co-parenting and social media rules
Welcome to So mini waysYahoo Life Upbringing Series about the joys and challenges of raising children.
“You have to rely on a lot of people to take on the mother role,” Busy Phillips told Yahoo Life. “The phrase ‘It takes a village’ sounds true, but we don’t live in villages anymore. You build your village with other ‘mothers’,” and not necessarily real mothers, she notes.
Philipps is not alone in her thoughts on motherhood. The Girl5Eva star works with online supermarket Zulily, whose State of Motherhood report found that 86% of parents who say a “mother” is someone who plays an essential role in raising a child with care and affection . For Philipps, her children Birdie, 14, and Cricket, 9, were raised in part by her beloved nanny, and the actress makes sure to honor them every Mother’s Day. She adds that it’s “really interesting to see who has risen in my life and taken on mothering roles,” including within her family and friends.
“My childhood best friend, Emily, has been with my children since they were born,” notes Philipps. “My sister was an aunt before becoming a mother herself and she was so committed to showing up for my kids. My friend Jen has taken on a really sweet mom role with Birdie. I think that’s important: when children grow into teenagers, they need other safe adults to rely on.”
That means plenty of Mother’s Day gifts: For all those early shoppers, between March 9th and April 18th, Zulily is launching a For All Moms Gift Advisor that gives anyone looking for gifts for the mom figures in their lives, answer two questions and you’ll become too forwarded to curated events to help you find the perfect item. (What Philipps likes about Mother’s Day is the time she spends with her kids.)
However, one aspect of motherhood she enjoys being responsible for is having some of the more difficult conversations. And as a mom raising kids in the social media age, Philipps says she’s had many conversations with her kids about navigating the internet landscape.
“The only thing I repeat to my kids is, ‘Once you’ve seen something, you can never take your eyes off it,’ and that worked well for us because my kids seem to have a deep understanding of that concept ‘ she explains. “Both of my kids are part of the post-social media generation – they don’t know any different. It’s changed for me in terms of my relationship with social media, in terms of how I share and what I share, but for my kids it’s a stretch to teach them about life as much as anything else.”
She adds that there are some “hard and fast rules” about what they do and don’t share on social media – as well as “there are about life and privacy and how to make each day, hopefully, your best.” show version of yourself.”
“Will you make mistakes? Of course everyone makes mistakes,” she says of what happens when her kids make a mistake. “But will you double down and dig in your heels and let those mistakes define you, or will you learn from them and move on?”
Philipps and her ex-husband Marc Silverstein follow a “nesting” strategy when it comes to parenting, which means their children don’t move households, but she and Silverstein do, and take turns coming to their family home and returning to separate apartments. Still, Philipps knows there’s no way to have a standard set of house rules for her kids that stays the same regardless of which parent is in charge.
“I don’t think you can,” she explains. “Married, divorced — I have no idea if that’s ever worked for anyone. Kids are so good at knowing which parent to go to when they want candy and which parent to go to when they need help with their math homework. We’re trying to have consistency, but with the understanding that maybe Mark’s had a hard day at work and is exhausted, so he’s giving them more screen time – that’s the way it is. Part of it is being as adaptable in parenting as you are in life.”
Philipps also takes on a new mother role: she plays the mother of a brand new Regina George (College Girls Sex Life Star Renee Rapp) in the upcoming film adaptation of mean girls Musical. The role, which was created in the Amy Poehler film, famously explains that she is “not a normal mom” but a “cool mom”. Of course, Philipps notes, that’s a title you’re not allowed to have Really give yourself.
“My kids don’t think I’m a cool mom,” she says. “My kids think I’m so embarrassing, and I’m so grateful for that… My kids like me enough, I think, but they don’t think I’m cool. Although Birdie thought it was pretty cool for me to play Renee Rapp’s mom – so I got a win this year.”
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https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/busy-philipps-parenting-140053987.html The hardworking Philipps talks about co-parenting and social media rules